How to Accept Unusual Gifts - Part 1: Badgers

Individuality is a large part of youth culture today, the result of which extends far beyond individuality of thought, into the social realm in which one is represented by the choices he or she makes; including gifts. With the constant increase in eccentricity of gifts given, it is only a matter of time before you receive something that you have not expected. However, the manner in which a gift is received plays an important role in the way society views you. In part 1 of How to Accept Unusual Gifts you will learn how to receive a Medium Sized Wild Animal cordially, using the example of a Badger. Please note that this article only applies to gifts given in person, as a thank you note is an acceptable response to all other manners of delivery.

The first step of course is the exchange that takes place before the gift is opened. There are two basic ways in which a wild animal might be given (given by hand or left on the floor.) The detail may seem small but the significance of the gesture speaks volumes. The gift, if given by hand, is very personal; the giver will want to see your reaction clearly, and will be excited by your sense of surprise. If the gift is given by hand the following actions should be taken. When accepting the gift smile and say, “thank you,” when you have a firm hold of the item. This establishes gratitude and will let the giver know that he or she can let go. Try your best not to look horrified when you notice that something is moving inside it as this will injure the giver’s feelings. If the gift is left on the floor, under a Christmas tree for example, it is not inappropriate to wait until the gift has been opened to say, “thank you.” In this case as well, you should try not to look horrified, but you can turn your back to the giver or hide your face if necessary. Under no circumstances should you shake the box.

When opening the gift, do so gingerly. Start by putting the box on the floor gently. Remove the tape without ripping the wrapping paper if at all possible. If the giver asks what you are doing and tells you it is all right to rip the wrapping, then you may proceed to do so. However, it is important to remember not to jostle the box too much as you may upset the badger within; with dire consequences. If once the wrapper is removed you find a brown paper box with scratch or bite marks in it, or a cage with something furry inside it, you may want to move the box outside to an enclosed yard, or otherwise fenced in area before opening it.

Opening the cage or box to release the badger is the most dangerous part of receiving the badger. If possible try to avoid opening the container and call animal control. The following instructions should only be used if the giver insists and you are exceptionally polite. The likelihood that it will be complacent will be low if it is still alive, and badgers are a fierce opponent when angered. Ensure that you are in an enclosed area with hard ground beneath you or the badger may escape. If at all possible, wear gardening gloves or open the container from a distance. At this point do not approach the badger. Do not hug the badger. Do not poke or otherwise make contact with the badger. At this time call animal control. You may enjoy the badger’s presence by staying back and watching it until animal control arrives. After animal control has taken the badger away, thank the giver for the exciting gift and ask them politely to never give you something like that again. Ever.

Whether you are receiving a gift at a birthday, religious holiday, life event, or for no reason at all, the same response will placate the giver. With time and practice these steps will become second nature and you will be an excellent gift receiver, which will encourage generosity in those around you.